Communicator: a person who is able to convey or exchange information, news, or ideas, especially one who is eloquent or skilled.
Thanks to the Internet, we live in a time where everyone can express their thoughts and feelings in an instant. Yet it seems people struggle to actually communicate.
Communication requires skills that go beyond simply sharing opinions. Unfortunately, many in our world tend to talk at other people instead of to or with them.
A good communicator is one who:
takes in information and reflects on it in order to understand
is able to organize thoughts and express them clearly
listens to opposing arguments with the intent of understanding differing viewpoints
These skills don’t come naturally for all of us. Thus children need to be taughthow to be skillful and thoughtful communicators.
Teaching your students to communicate well is a lofty goal—one that goes beyond simply making sure they can read and write. How can you do it? One answer is to teach language arts the BookShark way.
Teach Language Arts Skills Naturally
Natural learning methods take advantage of the way children have been learning since the day they were born.
Many language arts curriculums teach language skills in a disjointed way, as a collection of separate subjects. Because of this approach, students often struggle to applywhat they’ve learned about grammar or literary elements or even spelling in their actual writing and speaking.
When students learn language arts naturally, they see how these skills fit together. They see the application of the rules through reading, copywork, dictation, and narration.
Read Great Books
Reading aloud to students gives them the opportunity to hear books beyond their reading levels. This habit has several benefits:
Develops vocabulary. In order to master new words and incorporate them into both their spoken and written idiolect, students need to encounter them multiple times. It also helps to hear, see, and write them.
Exposes students to good writing. Students hear well constructed sentences, great descriptions, and literary language. No, they may not be consciously thinking about language as they listen to a story. But they nevertheless absorb the traits of good writing in much the same way they learned to speak —by being immersed in language.
Cultivates listening skills. Consistently reading to students develops their ability to listen. Don’t worry if your little one is rolling around on the floor while you’re reading! You’ll be amazed at how much they are retaining.
Encourages great conversations. Discussion questions, like the ones provided in BookShark’s Instructor’s Guides, are a great starting point. Reading books together gives parents and students a way to interact with ideas, character issues, and both fun and difficult topics.
Learn to Write with Copywork, Dictation, and Narration
Let your children learn to write from those who do it best: authors. Copywork, dictation, and narration are the foundation for learning language arts the natural way.
Copywork
With copywork, students copy from the books they read. This allows them to learn writing skills within the context of real writing—instead of doing drills in a grammar textbook or studying a separate, unrelated list of spelling words.
Dictation
After students are comfortable with copywork, they are ready for the next step. Instead of copying text from books, they write it as someone dictates the sentences and passages to them. This requires higher level thinking skills as they choose what punctuations to use, remember how to spell words, and apply the rules of grammar like capitalization.
Through copywork and dictation, children learn grammar, sentence structure, correct usage, mechanics, and spelling.
Narration
When students narrate, they retell something you’ve read to them in their own words. In order to do this they have to use several skills:
Listening carefully. This is pretty obvious, but students can’t retell something if they aren’t listening. If a child struggles with narration, consider building their listening muscles and ask them to narrate a smaller portion you read. Or tell them specifically what to listen for before you read.
Organizing their thoughts. Have you ever heard someone speaking who seemed to wander all over the place? Or maybe they were constantly inserting ums? Often people do these things because the information in their brain is a bit jumbled. When students practice narrating, they need to organize their ideas so they can convey the information in their own words.
Understanding what is being said. It’s impossible to put into your own words something you don’t understand. How do we understand what is being read? We listen carefully and ask questions when needed. When students know they will narrate what they are hearing, they know they’ll need to do the same: listen carefully and ask questions.
The ability to narrate means students know how to summarize and paraphrase. These skills are essential, especially when they begin writing essays.
Have Students Write About What They Know
When kids struggle to write, it’s often because they don’t have anything to draw from. It’s like going to a well without a bucket. If you want your children to be able to write, then you have to fill their buckets.
Then, with the skills they are learning through copywork, dictation, and narration, they’ll be able to organize and express this knowledge in writing form—sharing what they’ve learned with others.
Teach Language Arts Naturally to Help Your Kids Become Better Communicators
Students who learn language arts naturally know how to communicate well. Why? They’ve learned from some of the best communicators there are—actual writers. These students:
Apply the language arts skills they’ve learned to their writing and speaking.
Listen carefully
Seek to understand
Organize their thoughts before speaking
Write about the things they know
BookShark language arts teaches in a way that will help you reach the real goal of teaching children how to read, write, and speak well. It will help your kids learn to be better communicators. And we could all use more of those in this world. e memories regardless of our personal beliefs. We all believe in this—our kids are best served by being educated at home by their parents.
Purchasing a secular kindergarten program when I started teaching my first child, I thought I had a full grasp of the definition of secular homeschool curriculum. That was 19 years ago. I’ve since learned that the meanings of secular homeschooling and secular curriculum are not as straightforward as I may have thought.
Here are some considerations to help you dissect what is a secular homeschooler and what is secular curriculum.
Realize that Words Can Have Different Meanings
Not all curriculum providers embrace the same definition to the word secular, and the difference often comes out of the personal views of the author or publisher. It’s not that anyone is trying to be deceptive. It’s just that the same words can mean slightly different things.
By way of a silly example, someone from Chicago may balk at what a Southerner calls pizza—some flimsy, thin crust concoction that is nothing like the doughy slab that is more common farther north. Is this a conspiracy aimed to deceive? No. This is a difference in interpretation, experience, and vocabulary.
What Does Secular Mean?
That’s why you need to dig around and find out exactly what kind of pizza (or curriculum) you are getting to avoid disappointments! When shopping for homeschool materials, scour through the company’s About page, FAQ, and the Scope and Sequence to understand both the methodology and worldview of a program. When in doubt, contact the publisher outright and ask!
Don’t Confuse the Curriculum with the Education
Maybe you see a phrase like BookShark uses—faith-neutral curriculum. Don’t confuse that label with a faith-neutral educationbecause there is a difference. You may select a faith-neutral curriculum and be a secular homeschooler. Or you may choose a faith-neutral curriculum and be a Muslim or Christian homeschooler. It’s like a game of mix and match when it comes to labels!
One common thread all homeschool families can agree on regardless of their views is the right to educate our children in our belief system. You are the ultimate teacher of your views whether they are faith-based or non-religious. A curriculum can help you do that, but ultimately the job is yours. The day to day teaching, tutoring, and modeling your beliefs is the true education. Faith-neutral curriculum gives you the freedom to make deliberate choices. So a family that chooses a faith-neutral curriculum may actually have a faith-steeped education—or not. One isn’t necessarily connected to the other.
A few decades ago, the line between secular and religious homeschoolers seemed clearer. Either you were a secular family who did not believe in religion and adhered to evolution or you were a religious (usually Christian) family that believed in creation. However, this simple dichotomy is no longer the case in the homeschool world.
Today, secular homeschool families may be identified as religious or not religious.
What is the Definition of Secular Homeschooling?
For example, a family may choose to take a secular or neutral approach to education while still adhering to a personal system of faith. They are secular homeschoolers but they may be Muslims, Hindus, Christian, or Jewish. Their faith is something separate from their home education.
Secular homeschoolers who are not religious take many forms:
families who purposely choose to not teach religion
families who are not especially devout and prefer to let the child make his own choice as he grows
families of mixed faith who want to honor two different cultural backgrounds
families who want to teach their children that there is no one right religion but to respect all religions
familes who are atheist
families that espouse paganism
All of these families may consider themselves secular homeschoolers, but their beliefs are vastly contrasting!
Other homeschoolers may choose a secular or faith-neutral homeschool program while being very committed to their religious beliefs. They may buy a secular program but not consider themselves secular homeschoolers because they weave their beliefs into the tapestry of the education they provide their children.
For example, if they are Christian, they want to teach their children the Bible and want to be ensured that their curriculum is neutral of any anti-faith bias or government influence.
Also, there are plenty of religious homeschoolers who have less popular (or less orthodox) beliefs and would prefer to teach their own way of thinking when it comes to matters of the age of the earth, the origins of mankind, etc. They choose to use secular homeschool curriculum because they it’s easier to teach their views using resources from their worship center or from their own research. These homeschoolers may buy a secular curriculum, but they wouldn’t be appropriately labeled secular homeschoolers.
Surprise! This post didn’t succinctly define secular homeschooling or a secular homeschool. And that’s the entire point. These labels are general guides, and if you truly want to know what they mean, you’ll have to dig a bit further by asking probing questions—either from a curriculum provider or from a homeschool parent.
It’s hard to categorize all secular homeschool families with a single description because they hold different beliefs and motivations to educate at home. Homeschooling is constantly changing, and with it the meaning of secular curriculum and secular homeschooling also changes. What’s not hard is savoring the many choices of curriculum, cherishing the moments of learning together, and making lifetime memories regardless of our personal beliefs. We all believe in this—our kids are best served by being educated at home by their parents.
About the Author
Tina Robertson celebrated the graduation of Mr. Senior in 2013 and Mr. Awesome in 2015. Because of her love for new homeschoolers, she mentors moms through her unique program called New Bee Homeschoolers. She loves all homeschoolers, though, as she shares her free 7 Step Curriculum Planner, unit studies, lapbooks and homeschooling how tos. She can’t sing, dance, or craft, but she counts organizing as a hobby. She is still in the homeschool trenches blogging at Tina’s Dynamic Homeschool Plus.
In all honesty, I never thought I would homeschool my kids. I started because my oldest missed the cut off date for kindergarten and would have to wait a full year before starting school. She was beyond ready, so I knew I needed to do something. After a lot of research and many discussions, our family plunged head first into homeschooling.
We began our journey as unschoolers. The kids were young, and it worked well to have learning revolve around their interests. Then we moved. The new record keeping and evaluation requirements of that state made it difficult for me to continue homeschooling without a focused plan. I realized I was going to need curriculum.
Choosing Homeschool Curriculum
As you know, venturing into the world of homeschool curriculum can be overwhelming. I had no idea where to start. So I did what most of us do. I starting using what my friends recommended which happened to be well-known, faith-based curriculum.
At first, I welcomed the idea of using books that supported our beliefs. Unfortunately, I found that I don’t need (or want) the level of religion found within many Christian textbooks used for core subjects. In my opinion, they dedicate too many pages to watered down religion—pages that could be better used for more subject material.
For example, my kids don’t need multiple paragraphs in each chapter of a science book reiterating the point that God’s creation is perfect and beautiful. I want our science curriculum to focus on science. So now I look for faith-neutral or secular materials.
A Solution for My Curriculum Struggle
Because of the curriculum struggle I faced, I made the decision years ago to forgo standard homeschooling textbooks for most of our core subjects (like science and history) and instead create my own lesson plans. As a substitute for pre-made curriculum, my kids watch relevant videos, read living books, play educational games, and complete a ton of hands-on activities.
Compiling everything on my own is definitely time consuming, but works well for our family. Other homeschool families in my situation use a quality curriculum that isn’t faith-based such as Bookshark’s literature based, secular materials. The convenience of a full boxed curriculum or a curriculum plan for a key subject takes the burden off an already busy mom and allows her to enjoy the homeschool experience without spending hours of planning and researching.
About the Author
Megan Zechman is a veteran homeschool mom of two girls. Over at Education Possible, she shares creative, hands-on learning activities for middle school.
With one foot in childhood and the other entering adulthood, eighth-grade is a pivotal time. Choosing homeschool curriculum can be nerve-racking when you realize that eighth grade can set your child up for success or hold him back. I found inspiration for my son’s curriculum choices in a very odd place—a 1912 eighth grade exam.
Learning the art of cursive or diagramming sentences from the Bible seems archaic by today’s educational standards. However, the old-fashioned testing standards I saw in this old test helped me find a middle ground between relaxed and restrictive homeschooling. Here are three lessons I learned from this relic of one-room school days.
Lesson 1: Longer School Hours Aren’t Necessarily Better
Learning that longer school days don’t necessarily equate to more learning, I shortened the length of our school day and increased the level of difficulty in my son’s courses. Instead of sticking to grade level by purchasing eighth grade curriculum, I purchased high school level courses that better suited his true abilities. My son was able to get a head start on high school while still in middle school.
Lesson 2: The Basics Don’t Have to be Reviewed in Upper Grades
Learning more background of the exam, I realized that it was uncommon in the 1800s and early 1900s for a child to continue his education past eighth grade. Scholarships were awarded to students to encourage them to continue onto high school. Because eighth grade marked the end of most students’ academic careers, the basics were expected to be fully mastered by this level.
Taking a clue from this old test, I realized we, too, could move past the basics in eighth-grade and move into more complex subjects. I knew how much time we had spent covering the 3Rs over the years, and so I stopped scheduling them on our homeschool plan for eighth grade. Although it was frightening at the time, I reduced my son’s work in the basics, and he transitioned easily into higher-level courses.
Lesson 3: Curriculum Should Go Beyond Rote Memorization
Not all the things I read in the 1912 eighth-grade exam positively influenced me. Some of the history questions like name the last battles of the Civil War and the War of 1812 didn’t impress me as especially important for today’s society. It’s not enough to memorize battles or dates. Our kids need to understand the ideology behind decisions made in the past. Preparing a teen for high school or college means he needs the skills to look beyond the obvious and learn analysis.
So the last lesson I took away from this old exam was to scrutinize my long-term goals. In eighth grade I looked for curriculum that taught my son how to think creatively and critically and how to communicate effectively. On the other hand, because a relaxed homeschool atmosphere is important to me, reviewing my long-term goals didn’t mean I had to force my son to learn higher-level skills in middle school until he was ready. Achieving balance between relaxed and rigid homeschooling has always been challenging for me, and the huge amount of unused homeschool curriculum in my home is a testament to that fact. Reviving some of the learning standards from times past is something I occasionally wish for, but learning from them was far more valuable and inspirational than I imagined.
About the Author
Tina Robertson celebrated the graduation of Mr. Senior in 2013 and Mr. Awesome in 2015. Because of her love for new homeschoolers, she mentors moms through her unique program called New Bee Homeschoolers. She loves all homeschoolers, though, as she shares her free 7 Step Curriculum Planner, unit studies, lapbooks and homeschooling how tos. She can’t sing, dance, or craft, but she counts organizing as a hobby. She is still in the homeschool trenches blogging at Tina’s Dynamic Homeschool Plus.
Dyslexia and dysgraphia have some overlapping challenges; both make language-based learning an uphill battle. But while dyslexia’s struggles are mostly reading-related, dysgraphia’s struggles are mostly writing-related:
difficulty with spelling
trouble organizing thoughts into written sentences and paragraphs
challenges with the physical act of writing
We’ve had our share of all of these over the years. Nearly all styles of homeschooling require writing of some kind. But how do you teach what’s necessary when your child has trouble with writing or even completing worksheets? Here are five simple but powerful tweaks that you can make for your child with dysgraphia. They remove the bulk of the challenge of writing so that kids can better focus on the academic topic at hand.
1. Complete the Work Orally
We do a lot of our work out loud. For most of the elementary years, my kids narrate (orally retell) what they have read in every subject. Even in middle school, my daughter and I have book chats rather than completing literature worksheets. We cover the same material, and I’ll often ask the same questions as a literature worksheet has asked. But the questions are answered out loud, on the couch, over a cup of tea.
Writing begins in the mind, organizing our thoughts before they ever become words on a page. And for those who tend to be more extroverted anyway, talking outloud is a natural way to organize what we are thinking.
2. Serve as a Scribe for Your Child
After a long period of time of narrating out loud to me, my kids then go through a stage where I write down what they verbally express. Trying to hold a thought and write it at the same time can be particularly challenging for a child who has a language-based disability.
By writing down what my child is saying, I’m modeling the next step of the process without adding extra mental work.
Scribing is not just something we do in writing class, though.
I’ve scribed sections of a long math page when the process of writing the answers was more overwhelming than the math computation itself.
I’ve scribed spelling, as my child told me what letter to put down next.
We’ve scribed phonics worksheets and grammar lessons.
Whenever I felt the skill we were learning was more important than the physical act of writing, I picked up the pencil instead of handing it to my child.
3. Use a Dry Erase Board
I stumbled upon this quite by accident, and I don’t even remember how it happened. But one day I realized my daughter was willingly writing her own original paragraph on a large dry erase board with a marker, something she would never have been able to attempt on a piece of paper.
For awhile, a smaller dry erase board helped her complete her math problems as well. She could write as large as she needed and color-code the columns of numbers to help her line up the correct place values. Once again, she was focused on the academic skills without the added complication of writing small enough to fit the space in a workbook.
4. Don’t Fill Out Worksheets
Instead of writing on a worksheet which can cause frustration due to the tiny spaces, use it merely as a guide for writing on another medium.
For example, my youngest also has a very hard time writing the size that his worksheets require. His handwriting ability lags behind his phonemic awareness. But there’s no need to let his handwriting hold him back in his reading lessons!
Rather than mark vowels or divide syllables within the narrow spaces of a worksheet, I copy the words from his worksheet onto individual index cards, as large as the card allows. My son easily works through each word card, marking vowels and circling phonograms, and then happily feeds the completed cards to his tissue-box monster we’d made together.
He was focused on the reading skills he was ready to master but no longer discouraged by his weaker writing skills.
5. Use Technology
My kids learn typing skills early on. It’s my sneaky way of enforcing letter recognition, spelling, and reading. But typing has also helped my kids to progress with writing skills without being discouraged with spelling, grammar, and handwriting.
When it’s time to write, I always allow automated spell check and other assistive technology. Dyslexia Aid is another favorite that allows my child to dictate a phrase or sentence into the app and see it translated into text. For my family, it’s a matter of deciding which skill or combination of skills we are prioritizing, rather than insisting on all the skills at once.
It’s kind of ironic that we have chosen a literature-based homeschool with our assortment of language-based disabilities, but it’s not a decision I’ve ever doubted or regretted. Our challenges have not kept us from either enjoying good books or having deep thoughts about those books. We’ve simply changed our tools and strategies for success—and sometimes our expectations.
But in the end, that’s the life lesson I want my children to take with them. No personal difficulty has to signal the end of something we value; we simply have to find a solution that rises to the challenge.
About the Author
Tracy Glockle lives with her husband in Oregon where she homeschools their crew of three kids with ADHD/dyslexia. She’s constantly making adjustments for her out-of-the-box learners, finding creative ways to use their strengths to teach their weaknesses. As the frontal lobe for her family of ADHDers, Tracy loves planners and systems and organization. But housecleaning—that’s something else entirely. She enjoys black coffee, superhero action films, and reading the end of a story first. Tracy writes about homeschooling ADHD and dyslexia for several blogs including her own at Growing In Grace.
Are you ever curious about other BookShark families? We can assure you that, after interacting with so many customers at conventions and online, every family is unique! While there is another family like yours in some ways, there is no other family exactly like yours!
BookShark families span the gamut of family size, makeup, and approach to homeschooling. Of course, the one thing they all have in common is a passion for their kids. They invest deeply in and advocate fiercely for the academic and emotional well-being of their children.
One example is Kelsey, mom to Emmett, living in North Carolina. You may know Kelsey from Instagram where she posts under the handle @_little_mama_purple. We recently interviewed Kelsey to learn more about her homeschool experience. She will inspire you to overcome your own challenges and grasp all the benefits homeschooling offers!
Meet Emmett
BookShark: Let’s start with Emmett, because he’s such an adorable little fellow on Instagram. Tell me a little bit about him.
Kelsey: He loves books, puzzles, and his tablet. I always bribe him with his tablet. If he’s having a bad morning, and doesn’t want to do school, I ask, “Well, don’t you want to earn tablet time?”
BookShark: So that’s his motivator? Smart!
Kelsey: Yes. Emmett is six. He will be seven in September (2019). He has autism, global apraxia, and generalized epilepsy. He started wearing glasses at age four.
BookShark: What is apraxia?
Kelsey: It means that he has trouble talking and visually doing things¹. Sometimes he’ll write a word out, but he’ll leave a letter off. But in his head, he thinks he wrote that letter.
BookShark: Tell me about your choice to homeschool.
Kelsey: When it was time to enroll Emmett in kindergarten, we did an IEP with the school. They told me that he would get less therapies than he does now using our insurance. So, I decided to homeschool from that point.
BookShark: Did you have Emmett enrolled with services at age 3 because of his special needs?
Kelsey: No! I didn’t know there was special education available when he was little. I didn’t know there was early intervention, until he was almost too old to be in it. Nobody told me. They just handed me his diagnosis and said, “Here you go. He needs OT, speech therapy, and ABA². Go find it. Good luck.”
BookShark: Golly. That’s tough.
Kelsey: Yes.
BookShark: When you went to the school to find out about enrolling him, you discovered the lack of support for his special needs. That’s when you decided you wanted to go the private insurance, homeschool route, right?
Kelsey: Correct.
BookShark: Okay, and do you feel good about your decision to homeschool?
Kelsey: Yes, I do because Emmett loves to read. He’s currently learning to read using Reading Eggs, along with BookShark, and he just loves it. I mean, he brings me books every day. He asks, “Read to me.”
BookShark: But do you think that would be different if he weren’t being homeschooled?
Kelsey: I’m pretty sure that he wouldn’t be learning to read at all. He has some behavioral problems, like if he doesn’t get his way he can become aggressive towards others. I’m assuming that the school would put him in a classroom setting where might be disciplined to a point that would negatively impact his learning.
But because we homeschool, if he’s having a bad day, we take a break, we go do something else, and then we come back and it gets done. Even the best teachers in the world, they can’t love Emmett like I do. And the teachers have way too many children in the classroom, in my opinion.
BookShark: So are you planning on continuing to homeschool him?
Kelsey: Yes, I am. We already applied for a homeschool grant this year, and if we get it, we’ll be able to continue with BookShark curriculum.
Every Kid Should Be Homeschooled at Least Once
BookShark: Did you have any previous experience with homeschooling before you started homeschooling Emmett?
Kelsey: Yes, I was homeschooled from seventh grade until high school.
BookShark: So, you already had that in the back of your mind—that that could be a good experience?
Kelsey: Yes.
BookShark: Do you think there are parents whose kids would benefit from homeschooling but they don’t know about homeschooling?
Kelsey: Yes. I totally believe that. I totally believe every kid should be homeschooled at least once. Homeschooling makes you closer to your parents; you do more with your parents. You have a different relationship than if your parents send you away to school, you come home, you do homework, and then they put you to bed. You don’t really get to spend a lot of time with them.
BookShark: So I guess what you’re saying there, is as a mom, you would find one of the big benefits of homeschooling is the time you get to spend with Emmett?
Kelsey: Yes, definitely.
BookShark: What are some of the other benefits for you?
Kelsey: We get to go to the park when we feel like it. We get to go shopping when we feel like it; we don’t have to go when the store is totally super crowded. I mean, we can just get up and say, “Okay, let’s homeschool at two o’clock this afternoon, and let’s just go do some running around, and get some stuff done.”
Homeschooling Has Made Him a Reader
BookShark: What kind of strides has Emmett made in these two years of homeschooling?
Kelsey: He loves math. He’s a wiz at it. In language arts, he’s learning to write his name. He can now sign birthday cards himself. I found out that he loves dogs and horses. We just finished reading the book No Children, No Pets [in BookShark Level K]. He absolutely loves that book. I even had to put the book down one day when it was 70 degree weather outside. I told him, “No, we’re not going to read another chapter. Let’s go play outside for a while.”
BookShark: Now, you said Emmett has trouble speaking, but he can speak, right?
Kelsey: Yes. He speaks at like a three year old level, but he has a communication device that he uses.
BookShark: So, when he reads, does he just read silently?
Kelsey: No, he reads out loud, but he reads it phonetically.
BookShark: You also do a lot of reading out loud to him, I assume?
Kelsey: Yes. Yes, I do. All the time.
BookShark: Great. Well, when you decided to homeschool, I’m curious if you had any fears or concerns before you started?
Kelsey: Just teaching him to read has been my fear, but after my friend showed me Reading Eggs, it’s been real easy. And he loves the phonics books—Fun Tales—that are part of BookShark.
BookShark: I’m glad you found something that works well! Everybody uses BookShark in their own way, and it’s not bad or wrong, by any means, to supplement with extras if needed. So what parts of BookShark do you use? Do you use the full package?
Kelsey: We use everything but the science worksheets.
BookShark: Okay, but you read the science books?
Kelsey: Yes, we read all the science books. He loves them. He’s loving the Usborne Encyclopedia with the QR links [in BookShark Science K]. He loves to watch a video after I read what’s on the page.
BookShark: That’s super. So, what would you say BookShark, specifically, has done for your homeschool experience with Emmett?
Kelsey: Exposed us to books I would’ve never bought.
BookShark: Yeah, why not?
Kelsey: I’m one of those people that judges a book by its cover. I think, “I don’t really want to read that. It looks too hard to read.” Or, “The cover doesn’t look inviting.” But with BookShark, I’m like, “Well, it’s scheduled. Let’s read it and see.” And then I end up liking it!
BookShark: That’s excellent. Yeah, you’re right. A lot of people say that, that they go to the library and they’re just not sure what’s a good book and what’s not. These books are already chosen for you!
Homeschooling as a Mom with Autism
BookShark: So, I’m curious. You yourself have autism, and you’re very open about that. Your YouTube channel and your Instagram profile both say that you have autism. So, when did you discover that you have autism?
Kelsey: When I was 3. Emmett was doing something that reminded me of myself as a kid, and my friend said, “Well, go get tested. They can say yes or no. A diagnosis does not change who you are.” So, I got tested, and they told me I was level one³.
BookShark: When you learned that, did a lot of things just suddenly make sense for you?
Kelsey: Yes, definitely. I understood better how my brain works. I understood why I had meltdowns as a kid.
BookShark: So, Emmett has autism, too. Do you think that your having autism makes you a better homeschool parent, or does it provide extra challenges, or maybe it’s both? I’d love to hear your perspective on that.
Kelsey: I think it’s challenging, because sometimes my own autism makes me want to just get things done. But he’s having a meltdown and doesn’t want to do something.
But I’m learning to just go at his own pace, and whatever I’m feeling, just bury it deep, because it’s more about what he needs, not what I need. I’m getting more understanding of Emmett as I get older, but sometimes my own sensory needs take over. In those times, I just walk away for a while.
BookShark: That’s what moms do.
Kelsey: Yes, they do.
Anybody Can Use BookShark
BookShark: Do you think any family could use BookShark regardless of what kind of special need the family experiences?
Kelsey: Yeah, everybody could use BookShark. I think learning through literature is way better than doing a dusty old textbook.
Kelsey: Yes, because it changes. You’re not doing the same thing. When you do the same thing over and over again, they’ll get bored really easily.
BookShark: Oh, really? I thought autistic kids liked that pattern and repetition?
Kelsey: They do when it comes to a schedule. They want to know that math is coming up next and science after that. But they don’t want their science to be boring—the same every day. It it gets boring, they’re going to have a meltdown because they just don’t want to do it.
BookShark: I see. So, what do you do when the meltdowns happen? I know you say you just kind of step away. Is that your main strategy—take a break?
Kelsey: Yeah, take a break. For example, in level K, there are the writing sheets where they practice writing words and then sentences. Emmett has meltdowns about writing, so we just slowly do them throughout the year. If he has a meltdown, we take a couple days off. Then we pick it back up, and I see if he’s ready.
BookShark: That’s really good advice for a lot of homeschool parents. When you go slowly, this means you get “behind,” so to speak, on the sheets, right? Does that bother you? How do you deal with that feeling of “being behind”?
Kelsey: It bothered me at first, but now it doesn’t bother me at all. I know we’ll get to them when we get to them. Even if I pick them up two years later, we’ll still get to them when we get to them.
From “You Can’t Homeschool!” to “You Can’t Put Him in Public School!”
BookShark: When I think about your story, Kelsey, I’m struck by the number of challenges you face. You have autism, and your son has complex special needs. You’re a single mom, too. Some people might look at a situation like that and think, “Well, she can’t homeschool.” What do you say to that?
Kelsey: Yeah, my friends thought that I couldn’t homeschool. My friends wanted me to get a job and put him in public school. But now they’ve changed their tune to “You can’t put him in public school! You need to homeschool him!”
Actually, I am somebody else’s inspiration to homeschool! I have a friend—she has a YouTube channel where she talks about life with her daughter with autism who is about the same age as Emmett. She follows me on Instagram and says, “Every time I go on your Instagram account, I’m always writing down things I need to try with my daughter.”
She is talking about homeschooling her daughter next year because of what she’s seen me do with Emmett.
BookShark: That’s great, Kelsey. I love that you are encouraging other people to homeschool and showing people that while it’s challenging, it can be done! I’m just so happy that you are able to educate Emmett at home where he can be safe and loved, and he can grow at his own pace.orward in their education. Project-based assessments give children the opportunity to get their hands busy and their creative ideas flowing.
² ABA is Applied Behavioral Analysis. This system of autism treatment teaches desired behaviors through a system of rewards and consequences. Read more here.
³ There are three severity levels for autism spectrum disorder, one to three. Read more here.
Are you trying to figure out how to assess your child’s learning with Bookshark’s Reading with History? When using this wonderful curriculum, you may feel a little unsure when you reach the end of a topic or when you try to document your child’s learning. But don’t despair. There are many creative ways you can document and assess your child’s learning. And the best part? No tests required.
Assessments of learning need not include tests and book reports, yet this is often the default for measuring history knowledge.
When I was growing up, we generally followed the same schedule for each chapter in our history textbook: Read, take notes, answer end-of-chapter questions, end with a unit test. There was nothing of substance and it led many children, myself included, to dismiss history as boring and irrelevant.
Wrong! History is an incredibly interesting topic, serving as the map of how we got where we are today. It’s a blueprint to remind us not to repeat some aspects of our history as well.
While these changes may be totally unlike your view of traditional education, a curriculum free of textbooks and tests makes room for authentic project-based assessments instead.
My favorite way to choose projects is to chat with my child to see what she might like to do for the project. Here are five standbys for project-based assessments that we turn to often.
1. Keepsake Book
Reading with History is categorized by age range, with literature chosen to cover various topics within certain times in history. Children can read each book and then create their own keepsake history book by making an illustration or writing a piece that represents a memorable moment from that time in history. Continue adding pages with each new topic covered. Let them create and decorate a cover, a title page, and voila!
2. Digital Presentation
Since children typically enjoy using computers, a digital presentation is a wonderful way to present what they learned. Children can include images, text, and even music within this program to create a presentation that displays memorable moments from history.
3. Dioramas
Dioramas are 3-dimensional models, created in miniature, or in large-scale, as you would see in a museum. Children can use shoeboxes and decorate them to represent a scene from a moment in history. For older children, you might want to also include a written component where they describe in more detail what the diorama represents and why it is important.
4. BookShark Lap Books
Lap Book Kits are amazing for compiling the important information covered in the curriculum. I love the simplicity of the papercrafts because it makes learning the focus, which can sometimes get lost in the details of more complicated projects.
5. How Might It Have Been Different?
Imagine if one important component of the time period were missing. How might the world look today?
If, for example, the Egyptians never learned to embalm the dead, how might things be different in that area?
If the Europeans had never made it to the Indies, how might America look today?
Have older children explore this based on what they are learning in history and have them write an informative piece to cover this.
How to Create a Rubric to Evaluate the Project
One of the keys to success with project-based projects is getting your children involved in the evaluation process, for example with a rubric. A rubric is a tool that shows your child what is expected for the project and the corresponding grade for each level of fulfillment.
A clear rubric that you both agree on ahead of time eliminates the arbitrary feeling of subjective grading. Again, it is a great idea to get children involved in this as well, even letting older children make the entire rubric themselves prior to starting the project.
What do you expect to see in the final project? Note, this will look unique based on the project that is chosen. Give points value for this.
A narrowed topic
A certain number of examples to support the topic
A bibliography (for older children)
A certain number of reliable sources
Will you count appearance as part of the grade? If so, give points value for this.
Was the project completed on time? If you follow a more structured schedule this might be included on your rubric. Give points value for this.
Making history fun and relevant is important for helping children make connections and build a solid foundation of knowledge that they can carry forward in their education. Project-based assessments give children the opportunity to get their hands busy and their creative ideas flowing.
About the Author
Resa Brandenburg is a former teacher who is now passionate about unschooling her daughter. She lives with her husband in an old farmhouse by the river in Kentucky. Her favorite thing to do is spend the afternoon with her family, including her grown sons and two grandchildren. Her hobbies include traveling, reading, and quilting.
EPISODE 145 SEASON 4 | What makes a successful student or person? While there are a LOT of items on that checklist, there are a set of skills that can make it a great deal easier to be successful. This skill set is called executive functioning. It is a broad group of mental skills that enable people to complete tasks and interact with others. It is a skill set that allows a student/person to write that final paper, plan a business outline, or follow a set of instructions on what chores to do in a specific manner.
Join Janna and her guest Dr. Lauran Kerr-Heraly as they discuss time management and other executive functioning skills. Learn how you can help your child as they move through their educational journey.
ABOUT OUR GUEST | Lauran Kerr-Heraly is an award-winning educator and author who has dedicated her career to transforming lives through education. She was homeschooled all the way through high school, which allowed her to develop a deep appreciation for self-directed learning and a passion for helping others to take control of their education. Lauran has worked in college readiness in American high schools, taught in international and British schools in England, and currently serves as a professor in an American community college. Her innovative teaching includes turning a classroom into an escape room, multidisciplinary projects showcasing personal food histories and environmental justice, and experimental learning spaces. She helps students and parents develop a holistic approach to college success, which includes a focus on essential skills, executive function, and emotional awareness.
Janna 00:00 Welcome to Homeschool Your Way. I’m your host Janna Koch and BookSharks Community Manager. Today I am joined by Dr. Lauran Kerr-Heraly. She’s an award-winning educator and author, who has dedicated her career to transforming lives through education. Fun fact, she was also homeschooled.
I’m super excited to delve into our topic today about executive functioning. And believe it or not, it’s not just students who find themselves with a possible deficit in this area. Lauran, thank you so much for being here.
Lauran 00:30 Thanks for having me.
Janna 00:33 Why don’t you go ahead and give us just a little bit of your background and how you became involved in homeschooling? Kind of not even of your own volition?
Lauran 00:44 Yes, well, so I was homeschooled K through 12. And I like to say my parents were homeschool pioneers because we were one of two homeschooling families and my entire town and Wyoming. So things have changed quite a bit from them. But I really loved being homeschooled. And I graduated when I was 15 went straight to community college, which I also loved so much that I am now a community college professor. So as a student, I had a really good opportunity to learn about homeschooling. And now, I teach a lot of homeschoolers through the community college system, either in dual credit or recent graduates. And I’m also planning to homeschool my own kiddo. So I’ve gotten into a lot more kinds of homeschool groups and discussions, as of late.
Janna 01:36 Do you find it interesting that because you were homeschooled, you didn’t automatically want to homeschool your child because I’m the same way I actually didn’t. I resisted it for years about homeschooling my own children.
Lauran 01:49 I think it’s, you know, it’s something we considered. When we were looking at educational options, we considered homeschooling, private, public, whatever. And it just seemed like it wasn’t quite the right time. But now that our kiddo is getting to middle school, we want to road school and we want to do all these things that we think would be beneficial for our whole family. So it’s Yeah, it is interesting, because it’s always different with your own kid. And it’s part of why homeschooling works is because you can tailor it to what their needs are. And you can start homeschooling and then go to public school, and then go back if you want. So there’s there’s a lot of flexibility.
Janna 02:30 That’s nice. I think it’s a common misconception that if you were homeschooled, and you don’t choose to homeschool your children that must mean you had a negative experience. And that was not at all the case for me. I really enjoyed homeschooling, it just didn’t fit our family at the time.
Lauran 02:46 Exactly. And you know, my sister who was home-schooled with me is homeschooling her three kiddos. And so we both had a great experience, it was just more of the needs of our family, which is what we all want to really look at is what is the best possible educational situation for our kids.
Janna 03:03 And now you find yourself surrounded by homeschooled children coming up into young adulthood, looking to you and wanting more information at a higher level of learning. What has been your experience as you see this next generation of homeschoolers coming up into the collegiate realm?
Lauran 03:26 So one thing that I see with every teenager, regardless of their educational background, because you can prepare them with all the right SATs, classes, and all that subject tutoring, and you’ve got the essay writing coach, and you’ve been to all the extracurriculars. Every student when they are a young adult will struggle with executive function. And executive function. To put it plainly is the set of skills that help us get things done. It’s the mental processes that tell us to get things done. And the demands that are required of a student in high school, whether they’re at home school, or not exceed what their brains can do. And part of that is not their fault part of it too, because we ask a lot of them. Part of it might also be that we’ve scaffolded too much. You know, I think a lot of parents think, especially if they didn’t get a lot of help when they were a teenager, they want to sort of make sure their kid has everything. And that’s why Yeah. And homeschoolers have the opportunity to help their students in every possible way. But sometimes that means that they don’t have the skills to do things on their own. So those are some of the things that I see they’re universal, but particularly for homeschoolers, I remember you know, as I mentioned, I was 15 when I graduated straight to community college, and I had great homeschool education. academically, I was very prepared for the college environment. But I was not necessarily ready socially. And I don’t just mean with my peers, I mean, interacting with adults, I mean, navigating the systems of the college, registration and payment and scholarships, and all of that I was not prepared for. So there is this big jump, that we kind of expect students to go from having their schedule completely planned out. You know, even in homeschool, we say you have to do these five things, here’s the order, I recommend, and I’m going to check on you and half an hour and make sure that all of this is going well, you don’t have that in college, even if you’re living at home, and you’re in a college environment, you don’t have that kind of oversight. So it’s something that can be kind of a shock for students. When they get to the college environment, or even the high school environment.
Janna 05:59 It’s amazing how we, as parents try so hard to make sure that our kids are completely prepared. And what I am finding in my parenting, my twins will be 18 Soon is that we all parent, kind of from our own deficit. So like you’re saying, like, Okay, so maybe our generation had a little bit less oversight, right as I mean, and it kind of sounds like probably my homeschool experience was very different than yours. I was left to my own, I sought out my education, I loved education, so nobody could stop me, right, like nobody had to check on me. But from that, I do feel like I have micromanaged my own children, even as they have done concurrent enrollment, and being outside of the home. Because in my mind, this is what I would have wanted when I had been homeschooled, and I have to constantly remind myself that they didn’t have the same upbringing. So their need is not my need. And I know this is not groundbreaking, but as homeschool parents, I think sometimes it has to be reiterated like, you are naturally parenting your children and preparing them out of what you experienced their experience is not the same.
Lauran 07:15 Correct. And it’s important to recognize that they’re also growing up in a different world than we were when we were kids. You know, just homeschooling in general, like I said, two families in one town, and we had to drive five hours to the once-a-year homeschool convention, that was our only support. And now there’s so much support that it’s totally overwhelming. Like, if you search for Facebook groups, for homeschooling, it’s you’re gonna get everything. So in a way, we have to figure out how our kids how our students can get the individualized systems created for them. And they need to be part of that process that works for them. We have students who have different learning styles, we have a lot of neurodivergent, that, you know, finally we’re starting to recognize this society. And we have people who are interested in different career pathways, but they’re all going to have to take my history one-on-one class, and they might not care. So we have to figure out how to get them to care about everything that they’re involved in, and sometimes how to push through and do the boring things. And then also how to take ownership of their education and their skill set.
Janna 08:33 So when you’re seeing these students come into your classroom, and you’re recognizing these this deficit, what what are some of the tips that you have, that you share with your students, and then we can kind of talk about to the program that you created since you were seeing this so frequently.
Lauran 08:51 So if I’m going to speak to my college classroom, one thing that they really struggle with is knowing how much time the course is going to take. So I would say to them, it’s going to be you know, and I have a whole calculation, I’ve got a video on this that we can put in the show notes. But it’s how to calculate the time that you need for a college course. And this is a good thing to practice for high school homeschoolers because they can see, okay, this semester, my history class, is this many weeks, and this is how much time I need to spend per week and this is how I’m going to break it down, etc. So I do go through with them and encourage them to find time in their weeks. I have a lot of students who have care responsibilities, they have full-time jobs, etc. And this is also true of homeschool students who are dual credit or recent grads because they’re often taking care of younger siblings. They’re interning maybe in a company or they’re working to pay for their education. So it is significant that they sit down and they find a time in their week. It’s also important, you know, as we want to have warm open communication with our high schoolers, we want to have that same warm open communication with our college students. So I wouldn’t necessarily sit down with my sophomore in college and say, let’s figure out, you know, the 10 hours a week that you need to study. But I would ask them, to have an open conversation with you, you know, my students, I tell them, You need to tell your friends that between these two hours, you are not available, your phone is off, you can’t do the dishes, they’ll do them later, whatever it is you but you need to sort of, you know, arrange that time. So time management is a big thing. Time blindness is maybe a term that is a bit newer, but that is the sense that when you think, Oh, this thing is going to take five minutes, but it actually is a two-hour task. Or conversely, it’s a three-hour task, or you think it’s a three-hour task. And it’s a five-minute task. So you put it off till the very last minute, right? So having a perception of time that’s realistic can be a pretty big game changer. It comes to emotional regulation, which is a big part of executive function because that is a brain function that comes from the frontal lobe, and again, it’s around 25, that the frontal lobe is fully formed. And that can vary based on, you know, neuro divergence, as well as trauma and other factors. But, so if a student is in college before 25, they’ve got deficits there, right? So we have seen, you know, my spouse has been a high school teacher for a long time, I taught college prep high school, and I taught embedded ACT courses. I’ve taught in boarding schools. I’ve taught in a lot of different types of environments. And then my favorite is now what I’ve been doing for several years, which is Community College.
In all of those environments, I can almost set my watch to midterm. When everyone is going to have a breakdown, the students are going to come to me and they’re going to say I can’t do it anymore. It’s too much. I’m behind. My mom wants this from me, my job wants me to work more hours, or you know, I overcommitted or I wasn’t prepared for this course. And they just shut down. Some of my students will disappear for two weeks and not come back. And then they’ll come back when they’ve like, sort of composed themselves. But I tell them, you need to be communicating with me and the people in your life about what’s going on. So emotional regulation is one of those things that can be practiced. And it can be practiced on a micro level in high school, to start with awareness. And that can be just how are you feeling right now. Do a self-check. We use the feelings we’ll use. You can Google that. But my spouse and I use it too, it’s not just for kids. But it helps you identify? Because you might be able to say, Oh, I’m feeling overwhelmed. That’s not really a specific feeling, right? How can you break that down into something that is more specific? Once you have emotional awareness, then you can make a plan for how to deal with it. But if the midterm breakdown is coming, then you need to be aware of what’s leading to that as well. So practice that on a micro-level in the high school situation. Make sure you have a good support system, and make sure that you’re not overcommitted. And be kind to yourself. That’s a big thing for parents and our kids.
Janna 13:26 When my daughter called me yesterday, crying because there was a mix up with her schedule at school. And my first response is definitely to cry. I mean, I think, I don’t know if I’m the only one but I just feel like tears are my soul’s way of letting go of some of that overwhelm. So definitely cry. And then let’s figure out what had caused the problem. And part of it is, I think, fatalistic thinking of young adults because their frontal lobe is not fully developed. So they do need safe mentors in their lives to walk them through some of these things. It’s like, even though maybe wasn’t stuff that we talked about when we were kids, now we know when we can do better. She felt like she dropped the ball somewhere. And, so I was like, Okay, well, let’s get before we think about the rest of the schedule. Let’s get rid of let’s get down to the bottom of that feeling because that’s going to make you feel insane. If you can’t pinpoint what had happened. So come to find out she hadn’t logged into her college email. And when she did, the class had been canceled just the week before. So she did do that. She did register for it. It was on her calendar, and now she knows why it has disappeared. But once you can kind of like take away that. Oh my gosh, did I make a mistake? I don’t like making mistakes, Lauran. I don’t know that a lot of people do but some personalities can roll with it better than others have in mind. otter is very much like me. And so I was like, Don’t you feel better now that you know that you did do all the right steps and this was completely out of your control, you still feel out of control, right? You still have to come up with a solution. But just taking away that one thing of it, am I not paying attention? Did I do something and didn’t do it properly? It’s like these little things that just immediately when you’re already emotional about, you know, whether you’re finishing up high school and in college, or you’re in college, and you don’t know what the next steps are, that’s incredibly overwhelming emotionally for young adults. And then as parents, we feel it too, and we’re trying to fix things, but we’re trying to let them figure things out on their own. And, it’s this dance that we do that it’s like if we can eliminate things that are causing extra stress, and not eliminate it for them, but helping them walk through the processes to find out how they can eliminate it for themselves. It’s amazing that one thing changed the entire scenario for her.
Lauran 16:01 Well, and I think that’s a great example of how to handle it as a parent because emotional regulation does not mean like you’re a robot, it means figuring out how you feel and then being able to deal with the feelings. So I think that’s great. And, you know, I talked about how I was a procrastinator, and I’m still a procrastinator, but I was a much worse procrastinator in college because I’m a perfectionist. So I finally figured that was I had this moment I was 2am. This was back when we still had computer labs. So it was 2am. They were closing the computer lab, they’re kicking me out, I’m like my papers do the next day and the printer is not working. And I was like, Okay, this has to stop, I have to figure out what’s going on. And I realized that I procrastinated. Because I’m a perfectionist. If I waited till the last minute, I had a reason for why it wasn’t perfect. So once I figured that out, I was able to start earlier, I was able to just let it go, I was you know, a 90, it’s fine. An 85 is fine. Sometimes a 70 is fine, if that’s you know, which is how I handled math. But that, for me was a big game changer. And part of the reason I’m so passionate about executive function is because I’ve taught students with so many various backgrounds for a long time. And my spouse and my child were recently, a couple of years ago, diagnosed with ADHD. And it was one of those things that it was kind of like this lightbulb that like, Oh, this is why this is hard. I know. And this is this is what we can do about it. Because once you sort of know what’s going on with your brain. And in the case of ADHD, it is a disorder. You know, my husband always says I hate it when people say this is a superpower. It’s a disorder, it’s hard. But there are ways to deal with it. And you know, in our case, it’s a mix of medication and routines and just a lot of grace. But knowing all these things about ourselves will help us be a lot more gentle with ourselves. And then again, like I keep saying we have to create systems that work for us. I worked with a student recently, who for an entire year did not write down, any assignments. So was one of my one-to-one clients. And I said so you hate doing this, don’t you? And he said yes. And I said, Okay, well, let’s figure out a way for you to not hate it. So through conversations, we figured out that he’s really into graphic novels. So I said, Let’s every class do a square of a graphic novel. And we came up with a character. And we came up with a little soundcloud. And so this little character tells him what his assignments are for each class. But that was a total change. Because what his brain thought was, I can’t do this. And my brain doesn’t work this way. I can’t write down my assignment. So he didn’t even attempt it. But once we figured that out, it was like, Oh, my brain likes stories. My brain thinks this way. So that we’re doing it this way. And it’s a big change. So it’s liberating to realize that maybe your professor or your parents and homeschool will say you need to put your stuff in a calendar this way. The important thing is you put it on a calendar. Is it an app? Is it did you draw a giant Mind Map? Did you make a graphic novel, whatever it is, it has to work for you or you won’t do it.
Janna 19:20 My youngest daughter refuses to write down things. And I am a list maker and a box checker. So it frustrates me to no end. And as a homeschool parent, I find that everything I talk about it always comes back to how I need to change my perspective, and how I’m looking at things with my children as we’re taking this journey. And so I keep saying, Okay, I just don’t know how you’re not writing it down. It’s just that I’m trying to breathe through it myself because it doesn’t make sense to me. But I also know that you don’t always complete the tasks. So what we have yet to come up with is the system, we’re still kind of working on it. And if first you don’t succeed, try try again, right? I find that demanding things of my older children now really tends to backfire. And I really would rather partner with them to help them be successful, as opposed to them just being obedient. And that’s definitely not the type of parenting that I was modeled. And so it has taken well, almost 18 years with my first to, to really try to understand that executive function isn’t something that is natural to necessarily a lot of people. I mean, it’s something that can be developed, but you have to be aware of it right, you have to be aware that you don’t have a process. And, some people are just naturally, they make the list, and it feels good. And that works with their personality. But that’s not everybody. And so as a parent, it’s so frustrating. But it’s important to recognize these things so that when our kids do get to college or outside of our home, you know, they are prepared, even if it’s not the way we would have done it.
Lauran 21:05 Well, I think that you made several good points there. And I want to capitalize on the fact that you say you want to partner with your kids, which is the best way to do it. Because, and sometimes, you know, my daughter, and I think very differently. I have anxiety, she has ADHD. And so sometimes we’re like speaking different languages. So one of the things that has been successful for us, and what I suggest to parents is to find someone who thinks like them, some kind of other mentor that has, particularly if you can find a recent college grad. That’s golden because they’ll see, okay, this person is not a list taker, but they graduated, they did okay, what did they do? Right? So that can be helpful. Because our kids always want to listen to someone besides us, right? The other thing I would say is, when we are trying to support our kids, this is something that I have learned to do with my students, as well as with my own child is to not have hard starts. So that would be like, you know, the they come in the door, I got your report card. What did you do? Like, how could you like, you know, whatever it is? And instead of saying, first of all, you reconnect, how are you? But then with my students, I’ll say, you know, I’m noticing that you’re struggling. What’s going on? Like, let’s find out, I’m inviting them to tell me the emotional reason that things aren’t going well, right? And it’s also an opportunity for them to, because if I go to them, and I say you haven’t turned in the last two assignments, you’re gonna fail the course, that relationship is over, right? So what we’re trying to do is invite our students to come to us before things are dire, right? So this can be something that happens with a lot of first-generation college students in particular, or maybe they’ve had, they’ve been homeschooled, and so they feel some pressure to succeed because they’ve had a different type of education than their peers is that they, they’re not doing well, in a class or they’re not doing well at college socially. They’re miserable, they’re whatever, but they don’t tell anybody. And they just wait till the end of the semester until they fail. And failure is not the end, you know, I have students who have taken my class, I am very proud of this student who just took my class for the third time. And he had a lot of emotional stuff going on. He had all kinds of issues that were challenges, I should say. And he passed my class on the third time and we celebrated, you know, so failure is not the end. But also it’s before that midterm breakdown. Let’s have a conversation with our kids and say, How are things going? If you’re struggling in this class, it’s okay. If you’re struggling socially, it’s okay. So having that kind of safety net to put out for our kids, in the beginning, invites them to open up instead of saying, I’m just gonna, you know, I lost my financial aid because I failed a class and now I’m sleeping on my friend’s couch, so you won’t know about it. It’s a big stream, but it happens maybe more than you would realize. So again, that warm open communication, trying to figure out what’s going on emotionally inviting them to help you help them. The biggest thing is it’s their idea, right?
Janna 24:35 Well, that in and of itself is a whole other college course that I think all parents would take if it were available to us. Lauran, I am so pleased to hear you giving homeschool parents permission to give grace. I think sometimes there’s this outside pressure along with inside pressure when we choose to do something that’s countercultural, and then we feel the need to prove to those around us whoever they are, that we made the right decision for our children that we didn’t mess them up in some way. And so from the pressure out and the pressure in, it boils over and our children are unfortunately kind of a casualty that happens in that they’re the force that you know, that feels our force when it happens. So permission to give ourselves grace, and then that there’s nothing wrong with giving our children grace. And it really doesn’t matter what anyone else says or thinks. Because when everybody’s 35, and in their career and has their own families, if that’s their, what they choose, like, none of this stuff, none of the pressures are going to matter. But it’s what we do in the day-to-day, the relationship building that does matter.
Lauran 25:50 And the reality of the matter is, we’ve all done the best we can with the knowledge that we had. And so we need to give ourselves so much grace, because we’re learning as our kids are learning. And the world is changing very quickly. And maintaining a close relationship can be difficult, and it can be felt like a mountain that we’re climbing, but you just have to hang in there and be supportive. The because the students I know, you know, could be the first generation students whose parents don’t speak English. And they have very little context for the college experience. The ones that do better, are the ones who have a close relationship with their parents, and they can go to them and say I’m struggling, they can go to them and whatever. So that it is really significant. But, you know, being homeschooled myself, sometimes I’ll say to people, you know, I was homeschooled, and they’re sort of surprised, not because they, they don’t think it’s legitimate, but it’s like, oh, but now you have a doctorate and you’re doing this or whatever. I’m like, Yeah, so you’re right. But once we get to a certain point, it doesn’t matter. And we don’t really need to compare ourselves to anyone. In any situation, you know, this is this can be difficult if you have a neurodivergent child. And they’re being compared with their behavior or their you know, you know, for my daughter, she’s sometimes pulled out of situations so that she can get extra time or whatever it is. And I would encourage everyone, you know, I’m not a psychologist, not a neurologist. So if you suspect any kind of learning challenge with your child, definitely go and get them, you know, assessed because it is a game changer. My husband was 40 when he was diagnosed. And it’s like, it’s changed our whole life. But my students who have their letters, there are lots of accommodations, you know, that that has to be formalized. I have several students who have letters but never turn them into me. And because it’s they want to start over when they’re in college and prove that their dyslexia or their ADHD is not going to hold them back. And they can just do it their own way. Don’t make it hard for yourself, you know, and make it so that I always say smart students ask for help successful students ask for help. All you’re doing is getting the support that you need for the way that your brain works, and the way that you need to have help. You know, I had a, what, like an assistant dog in my class last semester, and I was like, This is great. Made everyone is happier, right? So because that student took the steps that she needed to have her emotional support dog with her so that she could focus in class. So this is, it benefits everyone if you get the help that you need.
Janna 28:44 Well, before we go, can you share a hack with our listeners?
Lauran 28:49 Yes. Just one. Okay. One of the things that with, you know, I’ve talked about executive function kind of in a sort of umbrella sort of way. But again, it’s really the set of skills that helps us get things done. It’s the working memory, it which helps us remember, processes, people with deficits and working memory, can remember, you know, we’re a big trivia family. So my husband can remember all kinds of trivia about like the 50 states, but he can’t remember to, like, unload the dishwasher. That’s working memory, right? And it’s something we joke about, but that’s just an aside. Anyway. So it’s mental flexibility. It’s emotional regulation. So on my website, I have an infographic called the College Prep Essential Skills infographic. What I recommend as a hack is to look at that infographic it’s I’ve divided it into skills of scholastic study, social, and sensibility, which is the emotional part. And so what I recommend is for you to take a couple of weeks and write down executive function skills that your kids do really well. I’ll. So for example, one of the executive function skills is being able to sort of remember and also process what you’ve read. So if your child reads a book and tells you about it, and has an opinion about it, that’s well-founded based on the text, write that down, write that, because that’s an let’s put it in a positive category, if they were helpful to a sibling, but that in the sensibility emotional regulation category, that’s positive, right? It can be really helpful for you as a parent to see, okay, maybe they’re like, again, that fatalistic attitude of like, nothing is working, you know, you got to start with the positive. And then I would take another week to note down some areas of growth. And then I would not go to your child and say, I’ve been observing you like a weird scientist for the last couple of weeks. But to say, you know, I’ve noticed that time management has been a struggle. And I wonder if there are some things that we could change or a way that I could help you? Can we change a system, etc. So that’s my hack is to start observing these skills, and then to pick just one or two things at a time, that maybe you as a family can work on together. And maybe that’s first you saying, like, you don’t have this to say, like,I have a list? Why doesn’t my kid have a list? You know, to step back, and maybe maybe the first change is to change your perspective. And then to think, okay, but there is still a gap, there’s still not turning things in on time, or the tasks aren’t getting completed. So list is not the answer. The problem is the tasks aren’t happening. What executive function skill category can we work on? To close that gap?
Janna 31:49 I hear you saying is literature-based learning where we read to our kids, and then have discussions and have them tell us the story back is a great way to build executive functions.
Lauran 32:01 Yes. And you can start, you know, we’re not born with zero executive functions, we all have them, they just need to be developed. And you start in kindergarten with, you know, my kid loved that memory game, right? Where you put all the cards down and you pick up to, that’s your developing memory, and then you develop working memory from then. So the book discussions, the memory games, the, you know, all in all, I could go on and on. But there are a lot of things that you could do in elementary school, to help your kids develop this. And you don’t necessarily have to tell them, that’s what you’re doing. But yes, all of those will help, there are a lot of things about homeschooling that do help build executive function, and that’s a positive thing I want to say. It’s just a matter of developing them and scaffolding them as they grow older, because, like I said, the demands grow higher than the executive function skills are at a faster pace.
Janna 33:02 So I think it’s also natural as our children start to age, we stop playing memory games, right? We kind of get away from reading aloud if you’re not in a program like BookShark, that it’s the forefront of the curriculum. And being intentional to continue and scaffold these very things are going to be so helpful for parents to continue to help grow their children in this area, which is an area that has not been growing. Maybe the best way it can be so Lauran, thank you so much for coming on today. How can our listeners learn more about what you offer through your courses?
Lauran 33:43 The best way to get to me is through my website, alteringcourse.com all my socials are on there. As I said, the infographic is on there. And all of my offerings are on there I have executive function cohorts is what I call them, and you can join the waitlist at any time. They are virtual experiences for students and or parents. And we do a lot of fun things in there to to assess executive function skills to help improve them. There’s a lot of gamification involved. So those are fun sessions but also you’ll come away with some really good skills and ways to continue to improve them.
Janna 34:27 And then you had a special for our listeners if they wanted to connect with you and purchase something from you, what can they expect?
Lauran 34:36 So you can get 10% off any products that I offer with the code bookshark.
Janna 34:41 Alright, you guys, you heard it here. Go to alteringcourse.com and learn more about what Lauran has available to help you and your students learn executive functioning and ways to improve what you already know your children have. Make sure to use the code bookshark if you want to purchase something from her and we’ll have all the information including the link to the infographic in the show notes thank you so much, Lauran. Thank you guys, until next time goodbye
Many of us were taught language arts as a disjointed set of unrelated skills—a very ineffective way to learn it. Can you relate to any of these experiences?
Learning about a grammar concept and completing ten to twenty exercises after the lesson to practice the new skill.
Receiving a list of spelling words on Monday and memorizing them for a test on Friday. Then spelling them incorrectly in your own writing.
Defining literary terms and never noticing them in the books you read.
Memorizing vocabulary words, but never actually using them while speaking or writing—and then forgetting them.
Following a formula to write a paper and hating every minute of it because you were as bored writing it as your teachers were probably reading it.
You did the work in school, but without context and without connection. As a result, you may believe you aren’t good at language arts. The truth is, you struggled with language arts because of how it was taught, not because of a lack of intelligence. Unfortunately we have a tendency to homeschool in the same way we learned, even if we believe our own education was lacking.
There’s a better way. You can teach language arts effectively, no matter your own school experience with the subject. After all, Albert Einstein said, “Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.”
Life-Long Learning Starts with You
As a homeschooler, know it’s perfectly fine to learn alongside your children. You don’t have to be an expert in every subject. It’s not even possible! What you do need is an attitude that says, “We can figure this out together.”
As Anthony J. D’Angelo said, “Develop a passion for learning. If you do, you will never cease to grow.”
It’s okay if you don’t master something the first time around.
Learning is a process that takes diligence and practice.
They don’t have to do it alone.
Modeling learning means you’re showing them how to learn, not just what to learn. You also get the benefit of a better grasp of language arts skills you can use in your own life. And you’ll also be more sympathetic when they struggle, because you know what it feels like.
Teaching Language Arts Comes Naturally
“Learning is not the product of teaching. Learning is the product of the activity of learners.”—John Holt
Your children began learning long before they ever started school. From the moment they were born, you watched in amazement with each skill they added from rolling over to lifting their heads, from sitting to standing, from crawling to walking.
You wondered as they picked up word after word and began speaking in phrases and sentences. You laughed at their grammar mistakes because they were adorable, and you knew one day they would say it correctly.
You were their first teachers. You encouraged them, you helped them, and you gently corrected their mistakes.
You’ve been teaching them since the day they were born, and you can continue to teach them everything they need to be effective communicators.
Workbooks and textbooks may offer lessons and exercises to teach kids language arts skills, but they are ineffective to inspire a love of literature and writing. Often students don’t know how to apply those exercises to their actual writing. They miss those things that make writing compelling to read and their speeches compelling to listen to.
Spelling and vocabulary comes from the books they are reading.
Writing assignments are tied to the subject matter they are learning about in the books they read.
Grammar skills are learned through copying and writing from dictation using sentences and passage from the books they are reading.
You see the pattern. Students learn from published authors—experts in their field. Good writing inspires good writing as students absorb language arts skills naturally.
You Have a Guide
Anatole France correctly said, “Nine-tenths of education is encouragement.” As a homeschool parent, tou have the opportunity to be your students’ biggest cheerleader—the one who encourages them and helps them stay on track.
But you also have a coach to help you along the way.
With BookShark Instructor’s Guides, you have everything you need to teach language arts, even if you don’t feel confident in your own skills. You get:
A 36-week, 4-day schedule designed to save one day a week for co-ops, music lessons, sports, field trips or other extra-curricular activities.
Weekly overviews
Student Activity Sheets
Separate parent instructions, answers, and definitions
Rubrics to help you evaluate more subjective activities
You Can Teach Your Children Language Arts
You may not consider yourself equipped to teach language arts because you didn’t understand the way it was taught to you. But there’s good news. You aren’t alone. BookShark can help.
You’ll have everything you need to teach your kids naturally, and along the way learn a few things yourself. It’s one of the reasons homeschooling is so successful. As a homeschooler, you are the facilitator of your children’s education. You don’t have to know everything, because like any life-long learner, you can find the resources to help.
About the Author
Kelly left teaching middle and high school English to homeschool her children and reclaim how she and her family spent their time. Followers of interest-led learning, her family’s days rarely look the same, but they tend to include a lot of books, art supplies, and time outside.
Kelly facilitates local writing circles for women and children and blogs about nurturing the love of learning on her blog, Curiosity Encouraged. She loves to journal, read memoirs, hike, and travel. She seeks quiet mornings and good coffee daily.
Roald Dahl said, “By the time I am nearing the end of a story, the first part will have been reread and altered and corrected at least one hundred and fifty times. I am suspicious of both facility and speed. Good writing is essentially rewriting. I am positive of this.”
While I believe Dahl is right, if my children thought they needed to revise a story one hundred and fifty times to produce good writing, they’d never pick up a pencil again. But if not one hundred and fifty times, then how many?
How many times should our child retake a test, re-do an assignment, rework math problems, or revise their writing? Should they do their best the first time or be given as many times as it takes to get it right?
Depending on whom you talk to, the answer varies. If you believe, as I do, the point of an assessment is to see what the student retained so they can continue to build skills and learn, then like me, you believe revision is essential. But revision can feel like a punishment. A redo can be synonymous with failure. I wonder if instead of asking how many times my child should revise, we ask, how can I help my child see revision as part of the learning process.
Before we ask a child to retake a test or re-do a worksheet, we need to make sure the assessment genuinely captured what we hoped to assess. A child who struggles with test taking may be able to answer the test questions correctly when they are asked orally. Instead of assessing what a child knows about World War I (your goal), the test could be assessing their test-taking, reading, or writing skills. A child who struggles with sitting still or following directions might struggle with workbooks. Is a blank page an assessment of what they know, or how they are being asked to show what they know?
Once we know what our child needs to learn, it’s important we, too, embrace revision. We have to check in with ourselves. Do we want our child to hurry up and get something done so we can mark it off of the Instructor’s Guide, regardless of the outcome? Here are five ways we can all see the importance of revision and help our children find success.
1. Focus on a Growth Mindset
Revision is part of the learning process. It is not the final step, nor is it a means to perfection. There is no end point when it comes to learning. The more we practice and dig into a skill, the more we deepen our knowledge.
Assessments given without the chance for revision can offer students the idea that their learning has an end.
They get an A+, the skill is mastered, and it’s time to move on.
Learning is not a race. Homeschooling allows us to slow down and offer our children plenty of time to make sure learning happens. We can slow down our curriculum. We can pause and come back when our child is ready, break down skills into smaller parts, and take our time.
3. Help Kids Practice Skills in a Variety of Ways
Drilling kids or using a method that isn’t working over and over will only lead to frustration. Once you identify a skill your child needs to work on, use a variety of ways to help them practice. If your child needs to work on fractions, cook something together. Play games where they practice multiplication, spelling, and grammar. Approach the learning from different angles, use multimedia, and apply hands-on methods. The more fun and engaging learning is the more it will stick.
4. It’s Okay to Practice One Skill At a Time
While revising an essay by hand allows a child to practice handwriting and writing at the same time, doing so over and over could lead them to hate revision, handwriting, or both. Computers make revision a lot less painful. Once they get their writing just the way it needs to be, they can always copy it or something else to practice their handwriting.
5. There Are Many Ways to Revise
Revision doesn’t have to look like red pen marks and rewriting the same paragraph over and over. It shouldn’t feel like a punishment. If a child is struggling with organizing their writing, have them cut up their paragraphs and sentences and revise by rearranging them in a more cohesive manner. Do a scavenger hunt with their writing and have them first find all the capitalization errors. Another time look for the spelling errors or missing periods. Give them fun pens and let them grade themselves.
You don’t have to even call it revision. We’re just continuing to learn.
When we help our children embrace a growth mindset, offer plenty of time to learn and practice a skill, make sure the assessment is measuring what needs to be assessed, practice one skill at a time, and use revision as tool instead something that feels tedious or like a punishment, the number of times something takes doesn’t matter. What matters is learning happens, the child finds success, and the child is motivated to keep learning.
About the Author
Kelly left teaching middle and high school English to homeschool her children and reclaim how she and her family spent their time. Followers of interest-led learning, her family’s days rarely look the same, but they tend to include a lot of books, art supplies, and time outside.
Kelly facilitates local writing circles for women and children and blogs about nurturing the love of learning on her blog, Curiosity Encouraged. She loves to journal, read memoirs, hike, and travel. She seeks quiet mornings and good coffee daily.
